Recovery Journey Roadmap

As chronic pain and fear of movement were my particular experience, this section focuses more on those suffering from bodily pain and fear of movement, so it might not be directly relevant to you if your symptoms are digestive, skin, or other types of chronic issues. However, the principle is the same - gently and carefully challenge yourself, face your fears at a pace that is manageable and do what you enjoy.

Movement might seem impossible at first if you’re in a lot of bodily pain, weakness or reduced mobility, but if you're like me, then fear is probably holding you back much more than pain is.

I started gradually exposing myself to movement, like really slowly, walking a little each day then once I felt safe doing this I started doing really gentle yoga, and generally moving around the house more allowing my body to do “normal” things and not fearing hurting myself further.

walking a little each day for example, then once I felt safe doing this I started doing really gentle yoga, and just generally moving around the house more, 

Yoga was the ideal solution for me and was so crucial to my recovery process that I totally fell in love with it and once I recovered enough to do it fully again, I went to yoga teacher training in India. I'm so excited to be able to offer bespoke yoga classes to the TMS community now! Get more information on that by clicking here.

I also have an online course to take completely at your own pace that includes various TMS-themed meditations, affirmations, journal prompts, restorative yoga, breathwork and much more, created to help you through your own recovery just like I did. Find out more about my course here.

Many of us in this space have come here because of deeply rooted repressed emotions, trapped trauma or PTSD/CPTSD. Treating trauma requires a psychological approach, but it is the body that quite literally keeps the score. A traumatised nervous system doesn't function like it normally should and we shift into survival mode like a deer in headlights, braced for impact.

When we learn to listen to our bodies, create space and safety within ourselves, moving somatically and consciously with the intention of focusing on the internal experience of movement then we can unlock, release and recover from stored trauma.

My yoga style isn't simply following a standard set of moves and breathing along with them. It's a deep connection to our physical bodies and inner space, feeling where emotion lives within us, connecting to all varied parts of ourselves and our systems, noticing, building awareness, feeling the vibration of our cells and the pulse of our body working in unison. Building our capacity to self-regulate, to feel, to grow.

In the book 'The Body Keeps the Score' by Bessel Van der Kolk there is a chapter dedicated to the power of yoga for trauma, he says:

It's about becoming safe to feel what you feel. These body-based techniques help you to feel what's happening in your body, and to breathe into it and not run away from it. So you learn to befriend your experience. Neuroscience research shows that the only way we can change the way we feel is by becoming aware of our inner experience and learning to befriend what is going on inside ourselves.

Teach the brain that movement is safe

Did you know that 80% of the information flowing through our nervous system, via the Vagus nerve is "afferent"? Which means travelling from the body to the brain, not the other way around? So gentle physical practices that cultivate a feeling of safety in the body can be far more effective than cognitive work alone. Breathing slower, moving intentionally and mindfulness all play an important role in teaching the brain that we are safe - which is absolutely KEY to switching off the sustained "threat" response and ultimately - chronic recovery.

By slowly and safely building a gentle practice where you are in control of the boundaries, how far and how long you go at every moment can be transformational in your healing. Sometimes just a few simple movements with the eyes closed is enough to really allow us to tune inwards and build our confidence in what were gradually exposing ourselves to.

Check out my Emotional Embodiment Masterclass series for extra help with moving feelings and trauma out of the body.

Something as simple as sitting upright when I used to believe a chair would kill me helped me change these ingrained beliefs. I gradually realised that I was safe and wasn't broken and the chair wouldn't hurt me, so I started to sit up. To a certain extent at first, I had to face the pain and keep reminding myself that I was safe, but when it didn't get any worse - I saw that as a win and I carried on 'upping the exposure' every time. I wasn't broken, there was nothing wrong, I was safe, REPEAT.

I talked kindly to my brain instead of my previous frustrated pissed off fed-up default mode, and as I did so, my confidence in this diagnosis grew and my tension started to release... 

Knowing that you are already well and solidifying your mindset is key to convincing yourself that you are well and there’s nothing structurally wrong with you (more in the MINDSET section later). We need to lovingly convince ourselves that movement will help our bodies not break them. As I did these things, with that new faith and confidence, I gradually got better. Not completely, but enough to further convince me that this was most certainly a mind-body (TMS) condition that I was dealing with and give me the hope I needed to carry on.

I’m not suggesting you sign up to a triathlon if that was your jam before, but maybe dust off your trainers and get out for a walk or a short bike ride. Float about in a pool and let your body move again in weightlessness if you can, it's so incredibly therapeutic to release yourself from the fear and feel movement again no matter how small.

Reach out to me if you'd like to take part in my Yoga for TMS classes, they're suitable for any ability level and can ease you back into movement without the urgency of some other body-based practices.

Get your life back! Love the outside world again, rediscover the joys you used to have before, like gardening, cooking, dancing, music and socialising! You’re re-teaching your body and your primitive brain that you are in fact OK, totally safe and these activities cannot hurt you. My fear caused me most of my flare-ups around this time, self-doubt can be utterly debilitating. It might take some time for your body to ease up and let you do these things without fear...just be kind and patient with yourself, and listen to your body if it needs to rest. But keep going.

Consistency is everything at this time, encourage yourself to keep moving, and keep reassuring yourself that you’re OK and eventually, your brain will catch up and realise that your fear has dissipated and you don’t need the symptom flares anymore. Some people can recover fully just by working on this point alone, but not me...I kept going. I got to a point where the feeling I was getting from practising yoga was far outweighing the feeling of fear of doing it, and it became one of my new obsessions.

Finding something you really love doing is important, so it's not a chore and you look forward to it every day...whatever that is for you, do it and do it often...

There are certain TMS support groups on Facebook that focus on 'Exposure Therapy', such as Our Limitless Mind by TMS survivor and coach Matt Iac, based in Australia. Exposure Therapy is basically another name for the practice of getting back to what you used to do or facing what you fear the most. There’s so much support out there, get involved and reach out to others doing the same as you, it's comforting, encouraging and you no longer feel like you’re suffering alone - you’ll find motivation and understanding like never before. The TMS communities online are like online therapy 24 hours a day, it really is amazing and literally, one of the only reasons I went on Facebook during my recovery.

I have support groups on Facebook too, you can join my private Yoga for TMS with Dani Fagan Facebook Group, we encourage and support each other to move without fear, whether you take part in the classes or not.

One resource that I found particularly motivating during the tail end of my recovery was The Mind and Fitness Podcast - a fabulous weekly show hosted by TMS survivor competitive weightlifter and Crossfitter Eddy Lindenstein. His own story and motivating interviews further convinced me to not fear exercise and I gradually reincorporated the intense weight-bearing routines I once loved but no longer practised due to fear. He also runs a private Facebook group for all things TMS, check it out here - TMS - The Mindbody Syndrome.