Recovery Journey Roadmap

I had tried every trick in the book and I expect you have too. Depending on what your symptoms look like, this will be a different set of specialists for each person. But I had rinsed every test, every type of doctor, every physiotherapist, osteopath, chiropractor, every exercise technique, back braces, every type of drug you can think of including steroid injections and all sorts of frightening prescriptions.

Everything except surgery (thankfully) and NOTHING had worked. If anything they made me worse! I was so afraid of potentially having to live my life in a wheelchair with no hope for recovery - that was the peak of fear for me. Despite what was showing on my MRI imaging, my doctors said that I shouldn't be having this much pain. I was frequently admitted to the Emergency Room for valium injections, which surprisingly, instantly worked. In hindsight, this should have been a big red flag to me that what I was experiencing in my body wasn't caused by a structural abnormality problem if it could be remedied with a muscle relaxant. But what did I know!? For that moment I was out of pain, and high, and honestly, I didn't care...but not for long.

My chronic pain symptoms spiralled, I was in bed for weeks at a time, couldn't walk far, couldn't sit, couldn't do much of anything, and I retreated even further into despair. The stress and overwhelming fear of THIS being my whole life made the pain skyrocket, I was UTTERLY DESPERATE and I was only in my mid-thirties at this point!

Around that time, I was thrown a lifeline that would change everything. I was recommended one of Dr Sarno’s books, 'Healing Back Pain' from a friend of a friend. What did I have to lose? To cut a long story short, I was finally faced with what was actually going on, I saw myself on every page of that book and knew that this was what was happening in my body. I was so relieved and so excited.

This approach to recovery is a wobbly road. Our lifelong belief in the medical model - that we fix physical things with physical solutions - crept in and doubt can take over repeatedly. Especially when symptoms change or worsen. I started to get really bad headaches that lasted for months at a time, they were so bad that I was convinced I had a brain tumour. So I had MRIs and CAT scans - which thankfully showed nothing.

I was yet to understand that the changes in my symptoms and the appearance of them elsewhere in my body were actually good signs and served as further belief later on...

I thought I must have had an injury or my herniated disc must be hurting me and maybe it's just my fear of my symptoms that's just lying on top of that, but again I was wrong. When I look at the symptoms closely (hindsight for the win!) my pain wasn't in the disc in my back, the pain was in persistently contracted muscles around that area, which I sometimes felt in my hips and into my buttocks too. 

Unfortunately, doubt, fear, confusion and wavering belief is all part of this journey, you could even call that a symptom in itself! It's pretty unavoidable and I wish I had known that in the beginning. Not for everyone, but for most. It’s really hard to believe that stress  being stabbed in the back with a hot machete. But let me tell you, hand on heart, this is real. 

Your body is literally begging you, screaming at you to take notice of the emotional pain you’re stuffing away inside...

I know it's a hard pill to swallow, but this work works better than any pill I ever swallowed, I promise you.

The often-overlooked element in mind-body healing is the mind itself. Rather than solely focusing on physical symptoms, addressing your emotional landscape and nervous system – however challenging when in pain – is essential for this approach to positively impact your symptoms.

To teach your brain that the solution to your problem isn't in your body, you may have to reduce or eliminate the amount of physical fixes you're using.

I stopped all physical treatments. This is a key part of Dr Sarno’s original methodology and an essential part of recovery. For me, that was a big step and so I expect it will be for you too. I didn't miss the costs of these treatments though, so that was a small positive to get me going!

It's important to note that it's OK to wean off these treatments slowly and as safely as feels right for you. It's a big step. Also, there is no shame in taking medications, and using soothing apparatus where you need to. Don't suffer more than you need to, as long as you're not expecting them to fix you. I like to see these kinds of things as training wheels to get me to my destination.

I was so into it all, stopping everything was a huge decision and leap of faith. No more daily shiatsu massager, (that I was using so often I had calluses on my back!) no more chiropractor, no more physiotherapy, no more specifically targeted back/core strengthening exercises, no more steroid injections, no more valium. I still took over-the-counter painkillers fairly regularly when I was really bad, but not much else. I took control back and got myself moving again with a very different hopeful perspective. 

I relied on these treatments to maintain my sanity, but all they were doing was subconsciously reinforcing the message to my brain that I needed fixing. That the physical symptom was the issue that needed treating directly.

I felt a little better straight away, just from stopping all these things and knowing I had the power within myself instead. And frankly, it was a relief. I had put so much meaning, pressure and fear into each treatment, expecting them to fix me, every day. And although they had given me some temporary relief, it was very short-lived and usually followed by a fear-fuelled flare-up or general worsening of the pain going forward.

I was feeding my symptoms with fear and ignoring my emotional self. I put so much emphasis on fixing the symptoms that I was constantly reinforcing my physical diagnosis whilst exacerbating them in the process.

Even though I knew I had a mind-body condition, I still fell into that old belief system, thinking that these things could help me cope with the symptoms. If only I had properly understood this key element and followed these simple instructions earlier!

So, if your primary goal is temporary relief, that's understandable. However, for lasting change, it's beneficial to explore inner resources rather than relying solely on external treatments to alleviate your symptoms. While external approaches might offer some comfort, sustainable relief comes from addressing the root causes within yourself.